Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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