I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
