yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
