some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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