All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
