what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
