I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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