I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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