we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Another day, another engagement, another cat
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
