Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
