I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
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