I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
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