i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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