ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
