a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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