So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Randomize
