He is such a slut. More and more my type.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
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