In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
