i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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