At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Randomize
