my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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