everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Randomize
