If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize