is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Will exercising make me less horny?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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