Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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