i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
