I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
