dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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