Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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