i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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