Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I just got carded by a ten year old.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
