He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
