it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
