Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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