i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I am one with the molecules
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize
