the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
