Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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