ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
