The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
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