why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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