Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
