dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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