if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize