At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize