So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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