38 yer olds are good kisserssss
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
