BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
