tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
