Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I would fuck him just for his dog
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
