After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
