Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize