that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
